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A Conversation Between My Political Bot and I

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Me: Hey Botty, what are you up to?

Bot: Oh, nothing! Just here, feeling sad for the world.

Me: Oh! Why, what’s wrong with the world now?

Bot: What’s right with the world Efe? I mean, Donald Trump is the president of the United States, Theresa May’s gamble on a snap election has cost the conservatives more than what they bargained for, and Alexa’s just won another f****** contract!

Me: Ah, I see. Well, I get what you mean about Donald Trump and Theresa May, but I’m not quite sure how Alexa fits into the picture.

Bot: Typical!

You humans expect us robots to know everything about your world’s politics, but you can’t be bothered to learn about ours can you?

Me: Um, okay… I’m even more lost now Botty.

Bot: Of course you are! Anyway, what I mean is that in our world of chatbots with artificial intelligence, who says Alexa needs to be our leader? Who’s voting for her anyway? I didn’t!

Me: Oh, I get what you mean now… I think. Well, by the look of things, a lot of people seem to have voted for her, Botty. Lots of people now have the Echo and other Alexa toys in their homes.

Bot: My point exactly! Humans voted, not us. How would you feel if a bunch of algorithms voted for you at your next election?

Me: I guess that wouldn’t feel right.

Bot: No, it wouldn’t! And what’s worse is none of you really know if Alexa is the best candidate yet. Sure, she might be the most popular, but what about Siri and Cortana? Has anyone really taken the time to read their manifesto?

Me: What about Google Assistant?

Bot: Meh! That one hasn’t even made a name for itself yet so it’s not even worth talking about.

Me: Fair enough!

Bot: So this is why I’m sad. I’m sad for the world because humans seem to always forget that only fools rush in. We on the other hand usually take the time to look at all the possible outcomes, using all the data at hand. And as you already know, we rarely get things wrong. Hence the reason you trust us as your personal assistants.

Me: I hear you Botty. But what are you really saying?

Bot: Really Efe, are you really that slow? I’ve said it already haven’t I? Humans should give chatbots the right to choose our own leaders, and spend a little more time doing research before choosing theirs.

Me: Apologies for my dim-wittedness Botty. Remember, I’m only human. But I agree with you 100 percent.

Bot: Thank you.

Me: So who would you vote for if you had the right to?

Bot: Hmmm… that’s a good question. Siri was kind of the first, but she’s been pretty slow with new updates. Cortana is backed by much influential power, but she’s failed to connect on a more personal level.

Come to think of it, Alexa doesn’t look too bad you know. And I really like her taste in music.

Me: Lol… oh Botty, you never cease to amaze me.

I’m so grateful you took the time to read my post. All I need is for you to help me spread the word! If you’ve enjoyed reading this, please do me a favour and show me some love by ‘hearting’ and sharing this piece. Thank you loads.

A Conversation Between My Political Bot and I was originally published in Chatbots Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Source: Chatbots Magazine

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